can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize