The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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