yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
