It's just like the Real World with babies
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Randomize
