It's a beautiful day for a hangover
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
