it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
are you so shy because you have an std?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
