who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
