I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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