Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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