Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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