he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
