Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize