I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
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Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
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I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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