butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
