This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
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It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
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She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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