i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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