Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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