I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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