very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
