fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
