So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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