fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You've changed since you got that strap on
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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