She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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