you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize