did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
