i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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