Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
