Ambien. No doubt about it.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
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It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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