Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
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Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
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I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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