He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize