I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
