That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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