Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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