You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Randomize
