I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
