Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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