Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
