come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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