I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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