Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
