walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
