sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
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I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
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I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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