It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
we're so committed to being not committed
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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