OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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