Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
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