well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
