My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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