Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize