Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
