he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize